One for the "World May Never Know" Box

This morning as I traipsed into work, a student came up and showed me his Speed Racer toy cars. Now, he knew he wasn't supposed to have toy cars in the activity climber that we have at the school, so he was giving them to me to hold on to. After going upstairs to our classroom, I put them away and realized how much car paraphenalia kids deck their cubbies out with.

I don't get it. I've never been into cars. I don't care at all what kind of car I own, as long as it has a good sound system. I think it would be good to know the inner workings of cars so that you don't get had at the mechanics garage. But otherwise I find cars to be about the most boring topic on our good green earth.

I get the Pixar "Cars" fixation. That movie's pretty cool for little kids. But it came from the Pixar gurus' love of cars. Gadgets make nerds jizz a little in their pants, new music releases make fans gaga until they've listened to the songs about ten times. We all have our obsessions. I go nuts over roller coasters and amusement parks. And adults liking cars, that makes sense along with the gadget gizmo stuff.

But kids could care less about Iphones. They could care less about music. Roller coasters deal with going through the air at 60 miles per hour, kids would bend over backwards to do something dealing with air in the face and speed. No question.

BUT CARS?! How are kids, especially boys, supposedly thrown out of the womb ready to like machines with wheels? The only reason I liked Hot Wheels was because it gave me a purpose to make racing ramps and jumps and tracks. I had something to go through my creations (kind of the precursor to wanting to make music, I suppose). But just having Hot Wheels cars for the sake of having Hot Wheels cars?

I don't get this one. And I'm sick of hearing about the fucking movie, too, every day. I have it! LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!!!!

Cake -- "Long Line of Cars"