When I woke up this morning, on one hand I felt terrible. Physically. One move of the head and I was going to lose whatever I had left in my stomach (funny that I took a shower, washed the blood and muck from my body, despite feeling that way. It goes to show how much fun I had on my birthday).
On the other hand, I felt great. Mentally. For the past quarter year I've felt some foreboding terror rising up within. It all went away this weekend. Well, drained to a point where only a few remnants remain. Enough to draw inspiration for the coming Patch projects.
I received a few gifts from my family. All checks. No tangible "present" presents, but substantial, nontheless.
The real gift, and this sounds like a Danny Tanner monologue, was the affirmation of friends in my life. Friday night I looked around the Rainforest and couldn't stop smiling. Afterward, at home, people were talking throughout the house, and I realized that every single person there was such a magnificent being. The people I hold near and dear to me are true soulmates. The people across the country, with whom I've grown close to, talked to me for 2 hours each over the weekend at some point.
All my life I've wanted to have a close group of friends. A core, a first ring, a second ring, etc. I saw it all in perspective this weekend.
I felt the tension falling out of my brain as each new event unfolded.
The Pub Crawl: meeting new people, having no inhibitions, feeling somewhat attractive despite the pains I took to make myself extremely unattractive, meeting random people that I knew all over the West Bank, dancing the night away with random strangers . . . everything that I've been needing. A friend filled evening turned into a Cowboy Night of introspection, resumption, and comic punishment (puke galore and laughing about it).
It was the best birthday I could have hoped for.
Nine Inch Nails -- "Adrift and At Peace"
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